How do you communicate?

Let’s start with obvious: Most of us don’t even know how to follow up this question with others. We don’t know how to think about communicating.

Public and private sphere

Some smart professionals put as much work and thought to how they communicate as they do to what is the information. Very reasonable. However, without proper training in meta-thinking about communication they could end up like doing the same trick even though reality has changed. And to work on obsolete models is, in this case worse than working without any model at all.

Tearing apart our lives (and in consequence communication) into to spheres is such an obsolete model. Private sphere is romantic idea taken from early to mid XX century. If a male is standing in the middle of great forest where no one and nothing can hear him – is he still wrong? Being a male, I don’t know. But still – this is the sole example of private sphere I can imagine today.

If everything you said or done went public, would you change your behavior?

Well, is it that extreme that idea? If you can read this words, odds are you possess at least few devices through which you could be easily tapped and watched. Hell, we all gave away information with little love notes to Facebook and Google. There is no need for God to watch us all – we are watching each other all the time.

Through the day we wear different suits of behavior and roles. Managers, employees, parents, lovers, colleagues, friends, celebrities, etc.. Juggling those puts a lot of stress on our emotional systems and cognitive abilities. And since private sphere isn’t an option anymore – some of us decided to put auto-censorship on ourselves. We tend to stay professionals at homes, as in we tend to codify our behavior in free time.

But, there is another way and it is gaining more and more acceptance – treating all public as it is private. Since there is no point dividing the two, and we always will slip information through auto-censorship – why then not treat all as a private? This has it’s challenges too: We need to be more decent, we need to treat communication more as marathon than the sprint to executing sell etc.. But, step by step, and minute by minute – this shift should be for the best. More decency, fostering true and continuous value and stronger social bonds – that can’t be bad.

Przemek Kucia

Tell me: how do you think about your communication? Also, please click share and like if you liked it. See you next time.